Doubt

"Shrimpers"
Oil on Canvas, 24 x 36
(c) Colin Page

I have been following the work of Colin Page for quite some time. He is an extremely talented artist who lives in Maine. You may recall that I have written about another Maine artist, Connie Hayes, and I believe that Connie has been an influence on Colin. In the world of perceptual painting, it seems that everybody's "bloodlines" cross somewhere!

"Secret Island"
20 x 36, Oil on Canvas
(c) Colin Page

I was perusing Colin's blog this week, and came across this quotation. Though it is long, it is worth sharing in its entirety. It captures perfectly some of the ups and downs of the painting life. Colin was responding to a question whether he was pleased with his paintings, and whether they had become what he was striving for. He answered thus:

Sometimes I am struggling with every part of a painting and I get in such a funk that I don’t think anything I have painted has any value, and other days I feel like I can do no wrong while standing at the easel. Of course it feels better to have a good day, but they are rare. Usually I am seeing things I want to get better at. Even though it is frustrating to constantly see flaws in our work, that is the only way to improve. If we don’t see flaws in our paintings, we become repetitive and uninteresting. To push painting to better results we always have to be a little disappointed in our work. We have to know that we can do better, and even though the painting you just finished may be the result of your most sincere hard work and effort, we have to know that the lessons from that painting will help do the next painting better. The painters whose careers produced the highest quality work were all searching for something just out of reach and doing everything they could to capture something fleeting. It may drive you crazy and be disappointing. But look at your earlier work and the improvements you’ve already made and imagine how much further you can go from here. A creative life is a constant battle between the disheartening and the hopeful.

Don't you just love that?! "A constant battle between the disheartening and the hopeful". Sometimes, at least in my case, the pendulum can swing between those two in a matter of hours. Or minutes!

"Around the Bend'
(c) Colin Page

Colin went on to share this quotation from Robert Hughes:

“The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is given to the less talented as a consolation prize. Indeed, the idea that doubt can be heroic, if it is locked into a structure as grand as that of the paintings of Cezanne’s old age, is one of the keys to our century.” 

"Masonic Street"
18 x 24, Oil on Canvas
(c) Colin Page

It's good for me to keep in mind, when my own pendulum has swung to the disheartening side, that the struggle is universal. And that every painting is a springboard to the next, informing the next and allowing you to move forward. As Connie Hayes says, the path to improvement is not linear, it's spiral...